Some people have felt like an outsider, a little weird, not quite getting it for most of their lives. For others, there can be specific circumstances which means their experiences are different from people around them. This doesn’t necessarily lead to loneliness but it can have an impact. Examples include:
- Moving to a new place, whether that’s to university, to a new town, or to a new country.
- Having a different gender or sexual identity from people around you.
- Having a different ethnicity, language or culture from people around you.
- Looking different from other people, this includes visible disabilities, including the use of mobility aids, etc.
- Being disabled, D/deaf or neurodivergent
- Relationship breakdown
- Experiences of trauma and grief
These experiences can leave people feeling on the outside of things, not belonging. Sometimes there isn’t space to name what that feels like, sometimes there has been a long history of that hurt being smothered. Some people have experience of being treated differently because of who they are, leading to sadness, anger and a lack of trust around other people.
If you feel like an outsider, then there can be a sense of disconnection from the rest of the world. It can feel like you are not allowed in. That you are perhaps not welcome. Therapy can be a place to explore these feelings in a neutral, non-judgmental way. The intention is never to deny your experience, or to get you to look on the bright side, but to see things as they are. That can create space for a little flexibility, a little softening. And in that space, if you want it, change can occur.
